


Molding a New Future

by w_x_2



Series: Pain turns to Gain [2]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Daddy Mickey, Eventual Happy Ending, M/M, Reunion Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-28
Updated: 2014-09-12
Packaged: 2018-02-12 17:39:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2118840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/w_x_2/pseuds/w_x_2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/727948">"And Let Life Tow."</a></p><p>Mickey's a long way away from when he had walked up to the Gallagher house and creeped in slowly through the unlocked door to see Ian. In fact, it's been 16 years since Mickey locked away everything he felt for Ian and pushed it down as deep as he could. Even though Mickey has smartly avoided Ian up to that point, in that time he has on occasion come to the Gallagher house. As such, he knows that now the door is locked without even trying, so when he reaches the door, it is to bang loudly on it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just a glance

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Characters do not belong to me, no harm is intended and no profit is made.

Mickey looks at his wristwatch in search of the time,  _late_. He looks back up at the closed door he'd previously knocked on but it remains firmly closed. Mickey huffs yet again, giving up on the front door as he's been standing in front of it for way too long and walks around the house to the back.

 

The black-headed man is a long way away from when he had walked up to the Gallagher house and creeped in slowly through the unlocked door to see Ian. Now, he knows that the door is locked without even trying so when he reaches the door, it is to bang loudly on it.

 

Thankfully Mickey doesn't have to wait long at all which must mean the person who is opening the door must've have been on their way to open the front door where Mickey had been knocking previously.

 

“Hold your horses,” comes from the inside and then the door swings open. But Mickey is already frozen in place before even seeing who is behind the door because he knows that voice. _Dreams_ about it.

 

He swallows as he comes face to face with none other than Ian Gallagher. Changed, older, _hotter_ Ian Gallagher, who once used to be Mickey's firecrotch. _Holy. Fuck._  And really, it shouldn't much surprise him that it's Ian in front of him, because it _is_ the Gallagher house, but on the other hand, Mickey is always told when Ian is due in the South Side from the army and he's sure as hell not been told this time because otherwise Mickey would have stayed far, far away from the house like every other time for the past 16 years.

 

Ian is completely still as well, hand still grabbing onto the door, and they’re just _looking_ at one another.

 

“Dad,” Mak comes running down the stairs and Mickey is reminded why he's here. To pick up his son.

 

“Mak,” Mickey replies as he forces himself to turn towards his son and away from the ginger man who is no longer his. It _hurts_. This is why he's stayed away. “You said you were gonna come back home,” Mickey rebukes although there's no heat in his voice. “Your mum has been calling.”

 

“Sorry,” Mak sheepishly answers.

 

“Let's go,” Mickey urges. “We should already be at the airport.”

 

The teenager replies, “Of course.” And then adds, “2 secs,” at the end which makes Mickey's uncomfortable world even _more_ uncomfortable by running back up the stairs and leaving Mickey and Ian alone once again.

 

Mickey can't help it, he looks back at Ian, Ian who is still looking at him, and they remain as quiet as before, not knowing what to say, where to begin. _Should_ they begin? They ended it. Finito. Mickey had buried Ian and his feelings for Ian so deeply before, and now the redhead is back in front of him, and it's all bubbling up to the surface with a speed which Mickey can do nothing about. It leaves him completely unable to try and push the feelings back down and the more they just stand there looking at one other, the more Mickey feels overwhelmed, like he's going to cry or throw up. This isn't right. Goddamn it. Mickey just wants to grab Ian and never let him go.

 

“Yo,” comes from the stairs, thankfully snapping the older Milkovich out of the turmoil inside his mind. When Mickey looks towards the stairs he sees that it's Liam standing halfway down the stairs.

 

“L-Liam, you ok?” Mickey fights to get past the lump at the back of his throat.

 

“All good,” the teenager replies with a smile.

 

There's thumps on the stairs and Mak appears behind Liam taking off the hoodie he has on.

 

“ _What_ is that?” Mickey alarmingly asks as he pointedly looks at the marked skin under his son's collarbone which has just been exposed, but doesn't bother waiting for answer. “Your mum is going to kill me!” And wows, thank God for small miracles, just like that he's a _dad_ again who has to focus on his _son_.

 

“She's not gonna say anything,” Mak protests.

 

“Your grandparents are!” Mickey replies with wide eyes. “Hoodie back on,” Mickey urges.

 

“It's Liam's.”

 

“Did you bring one with you?” Mickey asks already knowing the answer.

 

“No,” Mak answers like Mickey had expected.

 

“We're late, we're not going back home, besides, I'm sure he's ok with you borrowing it. Isn't that right, Liam?” Mickey looks down at Liam with squinted eyes.

 

Liam visibly swallows. “Of course, Mr. Milkovich,” he answers.

 

Mickey preens at the title on the inside, but keeps staring daggers at the boy on the outside to put further fear into him because Mak is his son and those _hickeys_ did not get on his son's neck on their own.

 

Mak rolls his eyes behind Liam but zips the hoodie back up. “Let's go,” Mickey says as a departing note, and turns around, forcing himself _not_ to look at Ian.

 

* * *

 

 

“What happened to just friends?” Mickey asks in relation to his son and Liam.

 

“Three weeks away happened,” Mak answers referring to how long they will be away to visit Mak's grandparents. “He tried to convince me to stay.” Mak blushes and smiles.

 

Mickey has the urge to snort at the way his son explains it but keeps it in.

 

Liam and Mak had met pretty early on, in fact, Mak had only been a few months old when _someone_ –Mandy who had got her shit together with Lip– demanded that Mickey and Mak go up to Lip's university for the weekend.

 

Liam had been there with them at the time, and since then the two teenagers had stayed in one another's orbit one way or another.

 

When Mak had told Mickey that he didn't like boys nor girls, only his best friend Liam, it had been at the tender age of 8. Mickey remembered the first time that Mak had come home truly angry at Liam, saying that he hated his best friend. Mak been 10 at the time and after a bit of prodding had started crying and broken down saying that he had pecked Liam but Liam had pushed him away and he'd fallen on the ground.

 

Mickey had not been pleased.

 

Regardless, two weeks later both boys had once again been alright with one another. When Mickey had asked Mak about the kiss, Mak had said it was stupid and that it didn't matter anymore.

 

At the age of fourteen Mak had gotten himself a girlfriend. What followed were the worst two weeks that Mickey could ever imagine. Not only did Mickey have the misfortune of walking in on Mak and his girlfriend making out, thankfully with clothes on but unfortunately with hands not in innocent places, but he also had the misfortune of witnessing eight different arguments between Mak and Liam, two of which had been physical and Mickey had had to break up with his own two hands as his words hadn't been enough. When Mak had finally broken up with the one and most likely only girlfriend he would ever had, things had calmed down a bit, something for which Mickey had been very thankful.

 

The calm hadn't lasted too long.

 

A few months later, a couple of weeks just before his fifteenth birthday, Mak had gotten himself a boyfriend. The things with the boyfriend were fine, Mickey even met him and the boy was rather nice. Plus it helped that Mickey hadn't caught them in any awkward situations, although Mickey _had_ learnt to knock. And things with Mak and Liam seemed to be going quite alright as well until Mickey noticed that he hadn't seen Liam around the house for three days, and then four, and then five and on, and on and on. That's when Mickey realized Liam and Mak hadn't been arguing because they hadn't even been talking to one another.

 

Mak had made a proper go of it though, lasted a full 10 weeks with the boyfriend before he'd told Mickey that he didn't understand why but the truth was, Liam was homophobic.

 

Mickey can't recall what he had replied in order to try and assuage his son, has probably forgotten it on purpose because it had been too close to home, back when _he_ was a teenager and it was him hating himself because he liked boys but wasn't supposed to.

 

Regardless, Mak had broken off the friendship with Liam as well as the relationship with the boyfriend all in one go.

 

Liam had fought for Mak though, somehow had gotten their friendship back although Mak certainly made him work for it. They had grown stronger than ever although the relationship had remained platonic. Mak had admitted to his dad that he remembered what he had said so many years back, that it would always be Liam for him.

 

The one. It had reminded Mickey of their similarities, because Mickey too had found his _one_ pretty early on, and in truth, although Mickey had tried, there really was no one else who could even come close to sparking feelings in Mickey how Ian did.

 

Now, a year later, it had finally happened. Liam had come to his senses. And maybe this wouldn't last, maybe this would be a one time thing. But if Liam broke his son's heart Mickey was gonna crush the boy. And the boy knew it too because whilst Mickey had never said much, he had certainly gotten his point across each and every time Liam had been the cause of Mak's sadness.

 

“Good for you,” Mickey replies simply.

 

* * *

 

 

“Ah, you're here, finally!” Svetlana comments as she walks towards them. She kisses her son on both cheeks, and Mak kisses her back. Mickey stands next to her and minimally flinches when she drops the usual kiss on his cheek, usually followed by a verbal complaint from Mickey which wouldn't have any heat in it, but which he can't utter this time.

 

Svetlana frowns at him but let's it go, dragging both Milkovich men to the queue as well as the trolley carrying their bags. The one good thing about being late to the airport is that the gate is close to opening and the majority of the people have already checked in which means the queue is small, getting an earful from Svetlana though isn't gonna be one of the best things. Mickey braces himself for it.

 

“Can't believe how late we are checking in,” she starts in disapproval with an arched eyebrow towards Mickey.

 

“Mum,” Mak says shifting her attention. “I know dad probably told you it's his fault, but he lied, it's m-”

 

Mickey sighs, “When I take the cover for you, you're not supposed to own up to it!”

 

Mak disregards him and says, “I'm sorry, it was my fault. I was meant to go back home after Liam's," he clears his throat and begins to bounce on his heels before continuing, "But I ended up spending the night. We went to sleep really late and I only woke up with dad almost knocking down the door.”

 

Svetlana squints her eyes at her son in curiosity due to his shifty behaviour but Mak doesn't give in this time, looks away instead with red cheeks.

 

“Finally got together,” Mickey reveals with a smile when Mak has been quietly staring off into the distance for a while.

 

“Ah,” she nods with a smile as well.

 

A few people ahead of them move forward and as such a space clears in front of them.

 

When they shuffle forward down the line Svetlana gets a bit closer to her husband in order to squeeze through the narrower lane but Mickey flinches. Svetlana turns towards him, unsure but definitely suspicious and reaches for his arm with her hand.

 

Mickey sees it coming but despite trying not to, he flinches. He's become soft as fuck again, and all it took was seeing Ian.

 

Svetlana only takes a few seconds to catch on. “Is he back?” Svetlana asks because Mickey hasn't flinched since back then.

 

Mak turns back towards them in confusion and asks, “Who?”

 

Mickey looks away without answering, instead biting at the inside of his cheek.

 

“Mickey,” Svetlana prompts, bringing her hovering hand which hadn't actually made contact with Mickey's skin, away.

 

Mickey swallows and turns his head towards his wife, focusing on a point behind her so he doesn't have to look at her directly because there are memories haunting his mind and God, it doesn't just hurt, it's agonizing. Not only that but he's starting to feel nauseous and hot and sweaty, probably a bit pale.

 

“Shit Mickey,” he hears Svetlana say although he feels like he's underwater and she's incredibly far away.

 

“Is he ok?” Mak asks, but Mickey can barely hear it over the buzzing in his head. He feels like he's suffocating under the onslaught of memories.

 

“Your dad can't travel with us,” Svetlana announces with a louder voice which Mickey manages to hear. Mickey looks at her in doubt. “There's a flight later on today, around 7 o'clock I think, gives you about 10 hours,” she finishes in a questioning tone.

 

“Your parents,” Mickey just about manages to remember to protest. Seeing Ian might not make things better, but he needs to try.

 

“As long as you come on tonight's flight, it'll be fine, I'll tell them you had an emergency.”

 

“What emergency? Why isn't he coming with us now?” Mak asks.

 

“You wanna take this one?” Svetlana asks with a genuine tone.

 

“I need to uh- talk,” he settles on that word although he finds it lacking. “to-uh, Liam's brother.”

 

“Ian?” Mak asks in confusion.

 

“Yes,” Mickey finally answers, allowing Svetlana to move ahead of him as the people in front of them move up to the counter so that they are next.

 

“I'm confused,” Mak adds.

 

Mickey lowers his voice so he can explain it to his son without being overheard.

 

“Your mum has a boyfriend, and has had a few in the past, but I've never had anyone. Because. Well, you were more important and even when I _tried_ dating, I wasn't happy." He really doesn't have to think much about what he's saying, as it flows easily out through his mouth, an explanation which probably has been ready at the back of his mind for some time. “I already had someone who I wanted to be with but we just couldn't be together at the time so we broke up and since then we haven't seen one another. But I saw him today, and I'm not sure that we can now, but I just need to speak to him.”

 

“You and Ian?” Mak checks. “Is that why Ian is always so weird with me? Like he tries his best to be nice and get to know me but he always has this sad look on his face.”

 

“I don't-” Mickey gets cut off.

 

“Yes, darling,” Svetlana answers before the lady at the counter asks them to step forward.

 

“Wowzies,” Mak comments.

 

“Are you ok with me going to see Ian?” Mickey asks because he knows that if his son says no, no matter how much it'll hurt, or what could have been, that he won't go.

 

“When you say talk...” Mak trails off.

 

“It could mean nothing,” Mickey answers. “Or everything,” Mickey adds, hoping that that is what it is and that Mak's further question will have meant that he's ok with Mickey going after Ian.

 

Mak nods. “Ian is a cool guy.”

 


	2. The Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We needed to speak,” Mickey answers in an honest tone.
> 
> Ian stays looking at Mickey for a few good moments while the tension between them builds. “You mean that we needed to fuck?” Ian corrects.

Mickey goes by the Gallagher house first but Liam, surprised to see him, –although still suitably scared enough for shagging,  _no way! Scratch that!_ Making out  _ only, _ with Mickey's son– tells him that Ian is not there.

 

Much like the last time, Mickey doesn't have to think much at all about where Ian could be. He gets in the car and drives to  _ their _ abandoned building, parking the car right above where he had beat Ian up back then.

 

He sits inside for a moment, engine still running, trying to see if he can spot the ginger man in any of the glassless windows or door-less archways. He finally spots a silhouette coming to one of the windows, looking out at the car before walking away from Mickey’s eye sight.

 

Mickey sighs, turns off the engine, and thinks about whether or not to go inside, whether Ian is running from him or coming to meet him. Whether he’ll actually know it's Mickey.

 

When Ian walks out, coming towards Mickey, Mickey swears his heart stops before it begins to frantically beat.

 

By the time Ian reaches the car Mickey feels like his heart is going to beat right out of his ribcage. Ian stands in front of the car looking at Mickey through the front glass and Mickey bites his lip, before he motions his head to the passenger seat although he doesn't break their eye lock.

 

Ian stares at him for a few moments before he nods ever so slightly, breaks their eye contact and walks around the front of the car to the passenger door. There he opens the door and then takes a seat before closing the door.

 

“Nice car,” Ian comments as he looks around the inside.

 

“Spacious,” Mickey replies.

 

“Liam said you were going with Maksy and his mum to see her parents,” Ian says getting straight to the issue at hand.

 

“Yeah,” Mickey agrees.

 

“So?” Ian prompts, wanting to find out why Mickey is there.

 

“Svetlana said I was taking the next flight,” Mickey explains.

 

“Got upset when she heard I was back?” Ian rolls his eyes.

 

“No,” Mickey answers, hands nervously rubbing the tops of his thighs.

 

“Hmm,” Ian responds, not convinced.

 

Mickey feels the need to explain why he's still with Svetlana because obviously Ian has an issue with it. “After a while, although we stayed married on paper, we separated and she moved out.”

 

“Visa?” Ian asks.

 

“Initially, but also less trouble in us going to visit her family in Russia.”

 

Ian hmms although not with as much disbelief.

 

Mickey swallows and looks sideways at Ian. “How long you back for this time?”

 

Ian looks up at him. “For good,” Ian reveals.

 

Mickey nods but doesn't say anything, instead turns to look back out of the car, Ian still in his peripheral vision.

 

“I never saw you when I used to come home for a few days off,” Ian comments.

 

Mickey rubs a thumb over his lower lip. “Mak would tell me you were here or that you were due to arrive.”

 

“Didn't wanna see me?” Ian turns up the corners of his mouth in a forced smile.

 

“No,” Mickey answers shaking his head but meaning that Ian has it wrong. “I just. What I did.” Mickey's hands splay wide, and he has to swallow past the lump in his throat before he can continue. “I knew that I couldn't do it again,” Mickey whispers as he looks out of his window, so that Ian is not longer in his peripheral vision.

 

“So you stayed away?” Ian rhetorically asks.

 

“So I stayed away,” Mickey replies with a small nod.

 

“Did you come to see me just because she told you to?” Ian checks.

 

Mickey turns back to Ian so that he can see the expression on Ian's face. “No,” Mickey answers.

 

“No?” Ian checks.

 

“Because I'd seen you,” Mickey answers the unasked question.

 

“Couldn't stay away?” Ian smiles but this time it's a real smile, even if a bit smug.

 

“We needed to speak,” Mickey answers in an honest tone.

 

Ian stays looking at Mickey for a few good moments while the tension between them builds. “You mean that we needed to fuck?” Ian corrects.

 

Mickey turns to look at him and sees the same heat in Ian's eyes as the one he's feeling.

 

“That too,” Mickey replies already half way between his seat and the one Ian is occupying. Their lips crash before Mickey has finished settling himself over Ian with his legs bent at the knees either side of Ian.

 

Ian's hands grab at Mickey's waist although they don't stay there for long. First Ian moves them up Mickey's torso to rack up his shirt and then around and down to put pressure on the hem of Mickey's trousers with the intention of bunching them down.

 

Mickey's hands grab for Ian's trousers, fumbling as he tries to undo the button because Ian is struggling with Mickey's jeans and has just slipped both his thumbs inside Mickey's trousers and boxers to better get a hold on them. Finally when he has the space, Mickey shoves a hand inside Ian's tight trousers to grab at  _ his _ -at least for the moment although if he has a say in it he ain't letting Ian go ever again- firecrotch's cock, already at half-mast.

 

Ian manages to push Mickey's trousers and underwear down enough to grab at the top of Mickey's ass cheeks and squeeze them in his hands at the same time that he splays them apart as wide as he can, exposing Mickey's hole to the air. Mickey moans at the pleasure, his trousers are still done up and the denim is digging into the bottom of his ass cheeks but no matter, he's managed to get Ian's cock out and he's positioning himself over Ian's cock despite Ian rubbing a finger over his entrance.

 

“Fuck, Mickey, wait,” Ian strangles out. “You're dry.” In response to that Mickey spits into his free hand and then wraps it around Ian's cock under the hand he already has there, slicking Ian up. “And tight.” Ian moans as he presses the tip of his finger inside Mickey just to have the pucker gripping him in a tight heat.

 

“Always have been,” Mickey preens as he pushes Ian's finger away.

 

“It's gonna hurt,” Ian protests as Mickey lines up Ian's cock with his ass hole.

 

“Don't move,” Mickey advises and he manages to wrench Ian's hand completely away as he clasps it with one of his because Ian's been trying to mess with his alignment. Mickey then goes down enough to feel the pressure of Ian's cock against his rim and pushes further down, enough to get the tip of the redhead's cock to breach him.

 

It's only the length of the slit, not even Ian's full mushroom head, and fuck, it's amazing.

 

Mickey braces his hands on Ian's shoulders and Ian runs his hands up Mickey's back. Mickey pushes himself down a bit more, tries to relax as much as he can as he takes in a few more millimetres of Ian's length. His rim clenches around Ian, almost pushing him out before Mickey rectifies himself and pushes down again, forcing Ian's cock inside of him past the mushroom head.

 

“Mickey,” Ian says, concerned.

 

“Shh,” Mickey replies as he leans forward and drops his forehead on Ian’s collarbone.

 

He stays like that for a while, letting the burn die down before he pushes down further and repeats the process of waiting before inching down a bit more, slowly, so torturously slowly.

 

It hurts like a mother fucker but there's something inside of Mickey again, and Gosh, that something belongs to Ian. _His_ Ian.

 

When he feels full, Mickey stops to check, he can feel that he doesn't have Ian anywhere up to the base, the back of his thighs are still touching air instead of Ian's thighs and when he uses his hand to touch first around the rim of his stretched entrance and then the length of Ian's cock he can feel that there's still more than enough for him to wrap his hand around.

 

Mickey  _ knows _ Ian can fit in there, has done before but it's been too long, and he's not prepped and he feels speared on Ian's cock, full and with an edge of pain which can easily be made into pleasure if only –  _ oh _ yes. Mickey ruts on Ian's cock, rubbing back and forth slowly as he seeks out his prostate and moves a bit forward to get some pressure on his own cock by the way of Ian's covered torso before he's tensing and arching as he has just enough mind to cover the head of his cock with his hand so that Ian's shirt remains spunk free for the moment as he comes.

 

There are stars literally floating under his closed eyelids. Ian's whining when Mickey snaps out of it, ass tightly clenched around Ian's cock and Ian's hands on Mickey's waist have turned white from the death grip.

 

Mickey relaxes as much as he can before he sits back and gingerly lifts off Ian until Ian's cock slips out with a pop, standing up straight on it's own from how full it is. Mickey uses his come to slick up his entrance before slipping in two fingers.

 

“Fuck,” Ian swears when he releases one of the hands he has on Mickey's waist to close his own fingers around the bases of Mickey's fingers, right by Mickey's rim. “Lemme do it, please,” Ian begs.

 

Ian doesn't have to beg, and Mickey doesn't have to think about it all, automatically answers, “Yeah, ok.” Before he slips out his fingers and reaches down for Ian's cock to coat it with the remaining slick.

 

Ian's hips thrust up in response and then the redhead enters Mickey one finger at a time. Moaning loudly alongside Mickey with the first finger as it enters Mickey up to the third knuckle.

 

Ian moves his head forward and attaches his lips to Mickey's collarbone, sucking a hickey on the skin as he adds his second finger, and only letting up with his lips on Mickey's skin when the blackhead is comfortably taking his two fingers.

 

“Get inside me,” Mickey urges, rutting himself on Ian's fingers.

 

“Wait,” Ian says as he presses deep inside Mickey and curls his fingers in search of Mickey's prostate.

 

“Fuck,” Mickey moans as he slumps forward onto Ian. He's still sensitive from having just come so he gets both a dash of pleasure and pain from Ian's fingers.

 

Ian lets up on Mickey's prostate and instead focuses on stretching him as he kisses his way up Mickey's neck and trails a wet tongue up to his ear so he can play with it for a bit.

 

“Are you done getting reacquainted with my ass?” Mickey asks with a rough voice.

 

“You feel ready?” Ian asks as an answer as he takes his fingers out to the very tips and then slips them back inside, spreading them open when they have been completely swallowed by Mickey's ass which causes the older man to moan before Ian moves them back out, fingertips just touching the rim as he waits for Mickey to answer.

 

“Yeah,” Mickey answers, giving the redhead the go ahead.

 

“In that case, my fingers are alright for now, but my cock certainly needs further reacquainting.” Mickey _would_ laugh, but he's too busy at the moment.

 

“Get on with it then,” Mickey urges as he begins to lower himself down, helping Ian to realign himself with Mickey's hole and in quick succession enter Mickey.

 

Mickey does it slowly, he's not as desperate to have Ian's cock inside of him as he was before his release but in all honesty his cock hasn't flagged and he still wants Ian inside of him just as bad.

 

Ian lifts his hips slowly up as Mickey continues to lower himself down to meet him and they successfully impale Mickey on Ian's cock bit by bit.

 

“God, fuck,” Mickey moans, fuller than before even though there's still quite a bit of Ian to be pushed inside of him which he quite eagerly continues lowering himself down on. By the time he's sat smash against Ian with the firecrotch's full length inside of him, there's sweat running down his forehead and he's burning up from the inside, eyes scrunched tight as he presses his closed lips against Ian's neck in order to muffle his moans.

 

“Fuck, Mick,” Ian moans as he lowers himself back down to the seat with a tight hold on Mickey's hips in order to keep him firmly seated on his cock.

 

Mickey's response is a muffled moan as he grinds down on Ian's cock.

 

“So close,” Ian wheezes. The redhead moves his hands from Mickey's hips to his back and down to his ass cheeks, fingertips slipping inside the bunched trousers digging into Mickey's ass cheeks as he grabs a hand full of each pert globe and squeezes, guiding Mickey as he helps him to find a rhythm where Mickey can keep grinding down on Ian and Ian can join him by thrusting in and out ever so minimally but just enough to create movement.

 

Mickey moves one of his hands from Ian's shoulders to run it down the firecrotch's torso, and then moves both hands behind Ian's back as he places a hand over each shoulder blade, hugging them tightly together as they frantically move and the pressure both inside Mickey and on Mickey's cock against Ian increases until he's right back on the edge.

 

Mickey hangs on for a few more moments as they both begin to shake, moving his head until his mouth is against Ian's shoulder, allowing Ian to get at his neck where he had been trying to burrow on to.

 

Ian whines and his mouth opens wide on Mickey's neck until he's biting down as he comes.

 

The pain pushes Mickey over the edge and it's black that he sees this time.

 

It must only be for a few seconds because when Mickey becomes aware of his surroundings Ian is just moving his head back.

 

Mickey feels one of Ian's hand taking the place on Mickey's neck where the firecrotch had had his mouth before Ian's fingers begin to softly massage the sensitive skin. It doesn't take long before he feels the other hand cup his cheek until Ian is putting pressure on it and as such pulling Mickey away from his shoulder and in front of Ian's face.

 

Ian holds him there for a moment, waiting until Mickey's glazed eyes focus a bit more.

 

Mickey is completely sated, and the only thing that could make this better physically is kissing Ian so he leans forward and closes his lips against the redhead's.

 

They're both completely exhausted and yet the kiss is frantic, both sucking and biting until finally there's a taste of blood. From there the kiss becomes softer, mellow, and they take their time exploring each other’s mouth, getting reacquainted and relishing in being so close to one another their breathing suffers.

 

When they finally, although very reluctantly, part from one another, they press their foreheads against one another. Mickey opens his eyes with a smile on his face, but Ian still has his eyes closed although there is a sated smile on his lips.

 

Mickey watches Ian's face openly while Ian's eyes are closed, feels the fondness he has for the man grow in him. Mickey wants to keep Ian forever, he can only hope Ian wants the same.

 

Ian clears his throat and his smile falters before he opens his eyes, making contact with Mickey's own as Mickey had been looking at him so intently. Ian looks off to the side, teeth biting into his bottom lip before he frowns and then moves his hands up from Mickey's thighs where his hands had travelled to while they were kissing, up to his waist where he closes his hand over Mickey's sides and begins to apply pressure in order to push Mickey up.

 

To push Mickey away.

 

And just like that Mickey's expression turns sombre, dread and worry filling him. They should have talked. They definitely should never have jumped into fucking without talking. What if this had just been a final goodbye instead of their future like Mickey had so hoped it would be?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story was supposed to be two chapters only, but then, my mind decided otherwise. Hopefully #3 will be along next week :)


	3. The Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Will you be my boyfriend?”
> 
> Mickey rolls his eyes, leans in to peck Ian's lips, “You're so stupid.” Ian smiles wide but waits patiently. “Yes,” Mickey finally answers with a rolls of his eyes. Ian leans in and kisses Mickey but Mickey breaks the kiss. “One more thing.”
> 
> “Hmm?”
> 
> “My life has another person.”
> 
> “Mak,” Ian answers confusedly.
> 
> “Besides Mak,” Mickey corrects.

“You're really, really tight,” Ian strains.

 

 _What?_ Mickey thinks as Ian puts a bit more pressure on Mickey's hips.

 

As wonderful as it is being inside Mickey, the older man is still too tight and Ian is sensitive from his orgasm and it's too much overstimulation. “Need to get out, please,” Ian requests.

 

 _Oh._ Mickey swallows, a bit less worried, and lifts his ass, allowing Ian's cock to slip out.

 

Ian cups himself as he pops out of Mickey, and Mickey looks somewhere over Ian's shoulder as he feels the loss, both physically, and although it hurts him to think it, emotionally.

 

“Don't pout.” Ian smiles as he rubs the upturned corner of Mickey's lips with his thumb and then slides his hand all the way down Mickey's body. Together with his other hand, he grabs two handfuls of Mickey's ass, squeezing the cheeks before opening them wide. He keeps one hand splaying Mickey's ass cheeks while his other hand hand moves further down so he can rub Mickey's entrance. It's easy to slide his index finger inside, the digit being swollen by Mickey's walls up to the hilt so that they both moan, Mickey at the intrusion and Ian at the heat and the feeling of Mickey's passage hugging his finger.

 

Ian withdraws to the first knuckle and curls his middle finger next to his index before he pushes it inside up to the first knuckle as well. Ian leans in to drop a kiss on Mickey's cheek as his face is still slightly turned away.

 

“Mickey,” Ian murmurs.

 

Mickey turns his head towards Ian, and Ian watches the pleasure in his expression as Ian slowly pushes his fingers fully inside and then scissors them, both fingers quickly becoming coated in both their come.

 

Ian pumps his fingers twice, Mickey's eyes closing briefly before they open back up, and then Ian draws back his fingers. With a cheeky grin he brings his hand into view, up between their faces. He scissors his fingers in the air, middle finger pointing towards Mickey and index finger pointing towards himself. He arches his eyebrows once, teeth closing around his lower lip as he looks suggestively at Mickey before he releases his lip and leans in, closing his mouth around the nearest finger.

 

Mickey's eyes lock on Ian's lips around his own finger, absolutely filthy as the redhead goes up and down with his mouth, fellating the digit, and then the other come coated finger before he too leans in. Mickey though, doesn't immediately envelop the finger in his mouth but instead stretches out his tongue to lick a stripe up the digit. The taste hitting his buds is practically familiar. He knows his own taste, but mixed in with Ian's, the taste isn't completely known to him. He decides then that he'll have to relearn Ian's taste, preferably later on today.

 

Ian's slides off his own finger, sucking all vestiges of _them_ into his mouth, and savouring before swallowing.

 

Mickey keeps licking all around Ian's finger until it too is clean, and then takes it in once before he hollows his cheeks and sucks his way back up. It has Ian moaning and when Mickey finally lets Ian's finger go the firecrotch leans in and takes Mickey's lips in a heated kiss. They heatedly bite and suck each other's lips before they slow down and take turns relearning the inside of one another's mouth.

 

Ian has done such a good job of getting Mickey distracted that when it's Mickey's turn to explore the inside of Ian's mouth he doesn't even take much notice in the wondering fingers once again rubbing all around his ass until Ian is sliding two fingers inside him.

 

“Ahmm-” comes Mickey's muffled moan, unwilling to part from Ian's mouth. Ian slides his fingers fully back out so Mickey slides his bum further down, hoping to either find them or that Ian will get the hint. Mickey can feel Ian's smile as he kisses him before Ian slides in once again.

 

This time when Ian begins to slide out, Mickey goes after him straight away, and Ian doesn't disappoint, starts up a slow pace of thrusting his fingers into Mickey.

 

It doesn't take long at all for Mickey to start squirming in Ian's lap, so Ian places his free hand on Mickey's hip to settle him in place, and then slowly takes his fingers out to the tips before joining his ring finger into the mix. Ian takes it slow sliding back inside Mickey, he wasn't kidding, Mickey is really fucking tight and even with the slick of their come and Mickey's definite want for Ian's fingers, plus the fact that Ian had his cock inside Mickey earlier on, he still has to slowly stretch Mickey anew in order to be able to completely push his fingers inside.

 

His fingers are squished, but unlike his cock, they aren't as sensitive, so he takes his time twisting and turning inside, seeking out Mickey's prostate.

 

“Just came, you little shit,” Mickey strains to get out the words after he breaks their kiss, his fingers digging into Ian's shoulder blades where he's holding him.

 

“But I think you got another one in you, don't you?” Ian teases rubbing Mickey's prostate.

 

Mickey unwillingly moans in response and Ian smiles wide, staring at Mickey as the man throws his head back, eyes closed.

 

Ian's eyes roam down to Mickey's exposed neck and he bites his lower lip at the mark he left there. When Mickey sees it he's gonna have _some_ words to say about it.

 

Ian leans in and nuzzles his nose against the mark which stretches from where the joining of Mickey's shoulder to his neck is, all the way up to just under his ear in a nice oval shape with the indent of Ian's teeth. Ian swears he didn't do it on purpose but it's one of the most beautiful things he's done. Marking Mickey in a place where it can't so easily be hidden, marking Mickey so clearly as _his_.

 

His cock makes an effort to join the party but Ian focuses on Mickey, runs his tongue over the path he had earlier left with his teeth.

 

“Not so soon, no,” Mickey finally bites out.

 

Ian eases up on his prostate, fingers turning away from it, but still deeply lodged inside Mickey. “Ok if I stay inside though?” Ian whispers against Mickey's neck.

 

Mickey's inner muscles contract around him and together with Mickey's moan it's enough of a response, although after a bit, Ian has to withdraw his fingers enough to completely slide out his ring finger before he can push the two remaining fingers back inside.

 

“Fuck,” Ian moans in response to Mickey's moan before he leans in to capture Mickey's lips. It's astonishing how tight Mickey is and he can't help but ask, “You not been doing this to yourself?”

 

“What?” Mickey asks as he brings his head forward onto Ian's shoulder, his hands running down Ian's back and then back up to the middle of his back where he lets his hands rest.

 

“Use you fingers.” Ian swallows. “Or even your toys,” he adds as moves his fingers around inside Mickey.

 

Mickey contracts around him and it's plenty a reaction although Ian doesn't know what it means but Mickey doesn't take long to explain.

 

“It's been a while,” Mickey responds. “Not really been in the mood to take it.”

 

“Do you mean?” Ian trails off.

 

“That I learnt to fuck, yes,” Mickey answers, the words muffled against Ian's skin.

 

“Have you found out that you like topping more than bottoming?” Ian asks with a cheeky smile.

 

“We're _talking_ and your fingers are inside my ass,” Mickey grunts. “What does that tell you?”

 

Ian stops the movement of his fingers and doesn't answer directly, but instead says, “You were wrong, I tried enjoying _it_ ,” he begins, bringing back the seriousness, after all, Mickey had said he wanted to talk. “Being happy without you, but I couldn't.”

 

“Did you try?” Mickey asks.

 

“Yeah,” Ian immediately answers.

 

“ _Actually_ tried?” Mickey reiterates.

 

“Yes, it didn't work.” Ian frowns. “I dated a few guys, even tried out for the other team once with a woman I was really good friends with.”

 

“You slept with a woman?” Mickey asks in surprise as he snorts.

 

“She was a doctor,” Ian looks about ready to say more but sticks to, “And she was fucking hilarious, would absolutely make my day. So when she came onto me after a while of us being friends, I thought 'what the fuck?' and went with it,” Ian finishes shrugging his shoulders.

 

“And?” Mickey prompts.

 

“I only did it the once,” Ian responds and it's clearly enough of an answer.

 

Mickey hums in response and waits for Ian to continue, his hands once again slowly roaming over Ian's back.

 

“There was also a serious relationship,” Ian reveals. “But we broke up after a while.”

 

“A while?”

 

“Two and half months,” Ian answers. Mickey 'hmms' again in response, which prompts Ian to poke Mickey in the ribs. “Over there in the 'Stans, that was pretty fucking serious,” Ian defends himself.

 

“Did you hear me say it wasn't?” Mickey argues back although in a very calm tone.

 

Ian doesn't answer and they're quiet for a while, long enough for Ian to slowly start moving his fingers inside Mickey once again.

 

Although it's pleasurable, the conversation has begun to turn serious, and it's only gonna get more serious, so after a while Mickey says, “Take your fingers back.”

 

Ian does so reluctantly, slowly dragging his fingers against Mickey's constricting walls on the way out, enjoying the heat and tightness for as long as he can. They are coated in their come again so Ian finds the nearest item of clothing and cleans his fingers off on it before he hugs Mickey to him with his arms around the man.

 

“I tried it too,” Mickey speaks up after they have been silent for a while.

 

“Being happy?”

 

“With someone else, yeah,” Mickey confirms.

 

“And?” Ian asks. After a while he feels his heart beginning to pound because Mickey's quiet for too long and what if Mickey did find someone else and had just meant to come and speak to Ian to smooth things over rather than to try to get back together.

 

“It didn't work for me either.” Mickey remains quiet for a while once again but then elaborates without prompting. “Mak was living with me and he was the centre of my world. I went on a handful of blind dates, all disastrous, but after I just stuck to going out to clubs and taking care of my physical needs.” Mickey clears his throat. “A few times once in a while was enough.”

 

It makes Ian jealous, thinking about the other people that Mickey has been with, but the fact is, they weren't together, and Ian was also with other people. “That was your 'trying'?” Ian dubiously asks because they were talking about finding someone else to be happy with and it doesn't sound like Mickey tried a whole lot.

 

“I tried with the blind dates,” Mickey reminds. “And I even tried with one of the guys from the club,” Mickey defends. “We lasted two weeks before deciding a relationship wasn't what we wanted, but we got on alright so became friends and we fucked once in a while.” He _had_ tried, it wasn't his damn fault that he couldn't bring himself to be with someone like he had been with Ian again, especially not when the redhead had ruined him for anyone else. “I didn't bother picking anyone else up from then on.”

 

“Do you still-?” Ian trails off, ' _fuck him_ ' going unsaid.

 

Mickey sits up straight, his hands coming around Ian's body and settling on his chest, and looks at Ian. “Scared of a little competition?” Mickey teases.

 

“Does he fuck you?'” Ian asks although the meaning is clear: Ian wants to know if Mickey bottoms for this guy.

 

“No.”

 

“There ain't no competition then,” Ian smirks.

 

“Ei,” Mickey jokingly punches Ian's pec. “I like topping too, besides, he's a great bottom and we have pretty good sex.”

 

“It's not fantastic then,” Ian retorts.

 

“You're jealous,” Mickey concludes with squinted eyes.

 

“How often?” Ian asks instead because Ian loves Mickey. Although Mickey had said he hadn't been able to be happy with someone else, it sounds like this thing with this guy is still going, and that there aren't any feelings involved between them, that it's strictly physical. So the fact is, it still probably is going on. And well, now that Ian is back, now that he's seen Mickey again and had him, Ian knows that he can't let Mickey go again. So maybe, if it's not that often, which will probably be even less often because Mickey will have Ian in his bed again, there are some things that Ian has to give in on, but at least he'll have Mickey.

 

“Once a month maybe,” Mickey mumbles.

 

“Tha-that's,” Ian stutters. Could he give Mickey up one day a month so that he could be with someone else?

 

Mickey sees it happening like in slow motion, Ian's sure, certain smug smile that sex with Ian is better than with anyone else turned to the confusion, and then the alarm that clouds Ian's expression. “I said we fucked, as in: in the past,” Mickey says with squinted eyes as he looks at Ian's scrunched face.

 

“Not anymore,” Ian can't help himself from checking.

 

“Exactly,” Mickey answers still with squinted eyes because the alarm is still on Ian's face.

 

“How long?” Ian prompts because what if it was last month and the time is due again?

 

Mickey rolls his eyes but answers truthfully, “4 and a half years.”

 

“Wait,” Ian says as his face turns confused and the wheels in his brain turn. “You said you didn't bother picking anyone else up from then on, I mean, from that guy.”

 

Mickey didn't plan on revealing this much so soon but, “Yes, what you're thinking is correct.”

 

“You been celibate for 4 and half years?” Ian asks in surprise.

 

“Don't make such a big deal about it,” Mickey rebukes, but Ian stays looking at him, waiting for an answer. Mickey sighs loudly. “Yes.” The smile that stretches on Ian's face is slow to appear but expands wider and wider, but Mickey has more to say. “You ruined my sex life, took the longest ass time for me to get back on the horse after you left.”

 

“You mean I ruined sex for you?” Ian teases as he leans in to peck Mickey.

 

“Your ego is too big already,” Mickey remarks without answering.

 

Ian brings a hand up to Mickey's face, cradling his cheek. “You ruined sex for me too,” Ian admits, and he swallows before continuing. “But you also ruined my heart, making it incapable of loving anyone else.”

 

Gosh, that fills Mickey's heart up with such fondness he feels like he's about to burst, but still, “You're so damn sappy, _Jesus_.”

 

Ian's smile is still there and he continues on. “You made me leave _after_ I was so deeply in love with you, that the only person I had hopes of being truly happy with, was you.”

 

Mickey looks away from Ian, turning his cheek into Ian's hand. He closes his eyes for a moment, before he turns back to Ian. “I _had_ to make you leave,” he says with a sure tone after he opens his eyes. Ian hums in response, neither agreeing nor disagreeing. “We could have tried being happy but it wouldn't have been for long.”

 

“And now we've been away from one another for sixteen years, you think we can be happy?”

 

Mickey sits up straight, looks at Ian's face and then searches out Ian's eyes so that they lock gazes. “If you want to,” Mickey answers solemnly.

 

And wow, Ian does, really bad, but, “What about your dad?” Because that was a big issue in the past and he needs to know whether or not it still is now.

 

“Back then, it was different,” Mickey begins. “I didn't have the courage to stand up to him.”

 

“And what about now?”

 

“Terry was given a life sentence,” Mickey informs instead of answering the question.

 

“He's behind bars?” Ian checks.

 

Mickey nods. “There was this one time Mak was out with Mandy, Mak saw these bracelets which he wanted so Mandy got them for him. One had beads with multiple colours on it, but the other two, they were pink,” Mickey reveals with a strained smile. “I met up with them at the house, Terry wasn't meant to be there that day, but at the time Mak knew his grandpa, and I wasn't going to stop him from seeing him. Anyway, Terry flipped out. Said that I was a fag and it was no wonder I had produced another fag.” Mickey swallows, just remembering it makes him angry. “That he had kicked the fag out of me and would do it with Mak too. When it was me, it was fine. But Mak. I couldn't let him grow up like I did.” Mickey puffs his cheeks but then continues. “I was scared shitless, but I had to protect my son, so I ratted Terry out,” Mickey discloses. “Testified in court and put him in prison for life,” Mickey finished.

 

“He didn't get back at you?” Ian asks with a worried expression.

 

Mickey shakes his head. “He didn't have the time to. Mandy started a rumour which turned out _not_ to be a rumour. Terry was killed straight away.”

 

“He's gone?” Ian rhetorically asks.

 

“Yeah,” Mickey confirms.

 

“Oh,” Ian breathes out in relief.

 

“I'm sorry I didn't have the courage to stand up to him earlier.” _For_ _you._

 

“Mickey, Maksy is your son. It only goes that you wanted to protect him. The fact that you didn't come out back when we were together doesn't matter right now, we're not in the past anymore, we're in the present and we can try again.”

 

Mickey wants to try more than anything, wants Ian by his side forever. “I love you.”

 

Ian exhales. “That's a confession and a half.”

 

“I should have said it a long time ago,” Mickey admits.

 

“We wouldn't be here if you had done,” Ian reminds as he brings his other hand up to cradle Mickey's face.

 

“I really do want to try if you'll let me.”

 

Ian hears what Mickey doesn't say. _If you can forgive me._

 

“I love you. That is never gonna change, only grow,” Ian assures.

 

“But we have to go slow.” Ian looks down at their naked bodies and Mickey follows his gaze. “Relationship wise.” Mickey elaborates as he looks back up and touches his hand to Ian's chin to prompt him to look at Mickey. “This,” Mickey gesture between himself and Ian. “I told Mak that I was coming to see you but-”

 

“Maksy is the centre of your world. I don't intend to ever come between you and him.”

 

“I've never introduced anyone to Mak,” Mickey says. “He's not stupid though, and I did tell him this could either be nothing, or a pretty big _thing_.”

 

“You told him how much you love me?” Ian teases.

 

“No,” Mickey answers in a serious tone and then makes sure that Ian gets that, “Look, I'm serious. Mak-” Mickey swiftly gets interrupted.

 

“We'll take it slow, you're the one who decides when it's time to tell Maksy. That is _if_ we are actually able to be together,” Ian reminds.

 

“We're not together yet?” Mickey asks.

 

“Will you be my boyfriend?” Ian answers with another question.

 

Mickey rolls his eyes but leans in to peck Ian's lips, “You're so stupid.” Ian smiles wide but waits patiently. “Yes,” Mickey finally answers with another roll of his eyes and also pink cheeks.

 

Ian leans in and kisses Mickey but Mickey breaks the kiss. “One more thing.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“My life has another person.”

 

“Mak,” Ian answers confusedly.

 

“Besides Mak.”

 

“What?”

 

Ian's face begins to drop again so Mickey hurries to answer, “Lana.”

 

“Who?” Ian asks with an even more alarmed tone even though it's clearly a female name.

 

Mickey curses himself for using her nickname and says instead, “Svetlana.”

 

Ian's face turns into a scowl as it dawns upon him exactly who Mickey is talking about. “What are you trying to say?”

 

“You have to try being –not necessarily friends– but _try_ , with Lana.” Mickey explains, “She is Mak's mum, and she's been good to me.”

 

Ian stays quiet for a moment. “She wasn't at fault,” Ian concludes about that thing way back then which they have never talked about.

 

It takes a while but Mickey finally speaks up. “No,” Mickey agrees.

 

“You still got a while until you have to be back at the airport, right?” Ian checks.

 

“Yeah,” Mickey answers.

 

“How about we leave the rest of the talking for when you come back?” Ian suggests with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

 

“You ready to go again?” Mickey asks like he's judging Ian.

 

“So are you!” Ian defends himself.

 

Mickey grins. “Totally am,” Mickey agrees and he leans in to nip at Ian's bottom lip before he kisses him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I initially wrote a sequel to And Let Life Tow which is set further in the future, but then the idea for Molding a New Future came along, so I have patiently been waiting to get back to the 'initial' sequel which chronologically comes after Molding a New Future. Now that what was initially 2 chapters became 3, and with it the end, I will be dotting the 'i's and crossing the 't's for #3 in the 'Pain turns to Gain' series. It shouldn't be too long. In the meanwhile, I can tell you the title: Not Our Anniversary, and the warning, or incentive, depending on your tastes, that Ian and Mickey will be swapping the 'giving and receiving' for a special occasion :P
> 
> Sequel: ["Not Our Anniversary"](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2324153)


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